My Personal Hell
by Zephyr of Shadows
Summary: It's worse though, some nights she chooses to torture me herself... 1st person, Warnings: beating, sodomy, cutting, suicide
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Hola folks... yes yes I wrote ANOTHER angsty one-shot… but maybe it isn't a one shot… anyway warnings: Language, gore, sodomy, beatings, cutting, suicide. As always please R and R and let me know if you think it's crap or not cause I truly want to get better, also an IMPORTANT AN at the bottom**

My personal hell

Why?

Why does everyone have to look at me with those eyes?

Why does everyone have to say those things?

What did I ever do to them?

What did I ever FUCKING do to them?!

"Scum"

"Demon"

"Beast"

They say it all while staring at me with those cold, cruel eyes

They say it and laugh as they beat me with their fists, their feet

Their bottles

There bats

Even the children beat me

Pummel me with their tiny fists and laugh

They always laugh

Laugh as I lay curled in the fetal position

Leaking blood and shit and bile

My bones broken

Bent and broken into angles no human could ever achieve

And then they spit on me

Spit and curse as they throw garbage and bottles at my dieing body

Yet no matter how much I want to give in

Just give up

Give up on hope,

On life

On EVERYTHING

Something starts to heal me

And it burns

It hurts worse then the beatings

Feeling each pulverized bone snapping, shifting, grinding back into position

Feeling my sundered skin cauterize and re-form on my broken and sobbing body

Feel as the organs, hanging on by mere threads outside my body get torn back into my body and reshape themselves into some semblance of normalcy.

I puke blood in that dirty back ally

It reeks of shit and vomit and piss

I just want to DIE but my body won't let me.

And then I hear it

Hear that damned, deep, sadistic animal growling

The demon keeps me alive

Telling me she relishes in my pain for daring to keep HER locked away

Every night she visits me

Making me relive the day's events

Night after night reliving the blades and kicks

The bats and glass that my broken body lived through that day

Some nights are worse though

Some nights she personally sees to my torture

Burning and then freezing

Being skinned alive, feeling every nerve ending burning with pain as the skin is ripped from my body.

Yet never

NEVER

Letting me die…

I scream

I scream and scream and NOBODY hears me

NOBODY cares

After all, I'm just

"Demon"

"Beast"

I don't even know my own name anymore

After the old man dies, no one feeds me

No one even TRYS to stop them

The crowd

The entire damn VILLAGE screaming

Screaming for my blood

The beatings, if possible, get worse

Soon I'm being stripped naked

Metal spikes covered in glass violate every hole that I have

It feels as if I'm being torn in half from the inside out

I bleed

I scream

I cry

And no one stops them

No one cares

That night my demon mistress finds new ways to torture me

She violates me with fire

She uses all nine tails

And I am dieing

Dieing again as I'm torn in two

As my body burns from the inside out

And then it stops

Its morning again…

I don't know how I managed to stay sane this long

I don't know how I manage to always greet each morning and plaster that damn smile on my face.

I don't know what,

Or when

Or how I finally broke

Maybe it was when the teachers decided to strip me naked and whip me with barbed wire

Or maybe, when the children were practicing with their kunai and one "accidentally" tore my eyes out.

All I know is the villager, the one _kind_ man

The town drunk

Gave me a way out

That day, he handed me a razor and told me that

"Thissh villagesh better without a damn dymon here, yoush know whatdda do scum," and mimed pulling the blade across his wrists and throat.

That night I didn't care about the house having been broken into and having shit smeared on my walls.

That night I didn't care that my cloths had been pissed on

Or that my ratty pile of rags that I called a bed had been lit on fire

Or that the house had messages scrawled on the walls wishing for my death

I slowly drew the razor across my wrists, then up the arm, then across my throat

I felt it

I felt the pleasant floating sensation that I assumed was my poor twisted soul leaving my abused body

I started feeling light headed and everything was turning white

Then

Nothing….

**AN: Ok… now that you have read it (you HAVE read it right?!) r & r as usual, flame me, praise me, hate me w/e but ALSO vote if you wanna see this one continued as one of three options 1) a two shot alternate perspective on this story (different persons point of view) 2) a nice LOOONG angst filled fic (I'll try and keep y'all entertained) or 3) a Naru/Hina angst/fluff fic…. Up to you, now GO ON… VOTE!!! **


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Well hello again folks… looks like I'm back!! D Sorry this has taken so long… also, I DO NOT own Naruto, yadda yadda, all that good stuff… now, on with the fic**

My Personal Hell

I come to in a world of dark, sludgy water

It appears as if I am in a jail built in a sewer

Of course, where ells would I end up but in a hell much like my life?

But then I hear the low, demonic laughter

See the glowing, soulless red eyes of my demon master

She is laughing at me, at my pathetic attempts to end my life…

"**So Kit, you decide to visit me, after **_**ALL **_**this time, you demean to grace me with your presence…" **she purrs to me

"What do you mean, you stupid bitch?" I shout

"Why can't you just let me _DIE!?"_

"**Because, you are my Kit, and I have been trying and **_**TRYING **_**to get you to come and visit me for a long while now…"** she states, her lips curling up in a feral smile

"**You see, those people didn't love you, in fact, they may have hated you even more than me, what with them choosing **_**YOU **_**to be my host body… I felt that if I could get you to come here to me, I may be able to do something to…rectify… both of our situations…"**

"NO… no matter how much the village hates me I will NOT let you out to destroy them…"

"**What if I can give you a way out… let you find the peace you so desperately grasp for?"**

"…Why? Why would you do something for me when I have kept you captive for so long?"

"**Because, I feel the need to protect **_**MY **_**kit… **_**MY **_**family…"**

As we are speaking I feel the oppressive presence of Kyubis chakra building around me, as she begins to heal my body

"What are you doing to me? Why are you healing me if you said you would allow me peace?" I nearly sob

"**Look kit, look what I am doing for you" **she whispers as she grants access to the view my eyes are providing from the 'real' time to our the room in the seal

As I watch, I see my body pick up one of the larger shards of glass on the floor, seeing a reflection of myself I nearly scream in shock

My eyes have turned into a deep, blood red color, gaining a slit that is a dark, putrid yellow that glows demonically. While my new eyes focus on the glass I notice that my face has taken on a more angular, muscular build, and that my teeth have turned into fangs. The whisker marks that were barely noticeable before have grown and thickened into deep, black scars across my face. Looking up, my new "body" notices that my hair has grown out into a mane of shaggy black locks tipped with blood like specks of red. Upon my head, two large fox ears have grown and my body itself has changed. It is much taller now, standing at about six feet, and has grown incredibly muscular, yet kept an almost feline tone. I have also gained nine tails of the same course, dark hair which now grows from my head. Upon examining the hand that is holding the glass, I notice that my nails have grown out and become black and much more claw like.

"**Well Kit, do you like it?"**

I almost fall over in shock, I had nearly forgotten that Kyubi was here with me

"What have you _DONE?!"_ I scream hysterically, "If the beatings were bad before, they are going to _KILL_ me now!!"

"**Relax kit, this new body is much less vulnerable than your previous, and the healing factor has sped up remarkably, also, your chakra reserves are nearly as high as mine now, and your control has greatly increased…"**

"It looks like I won't have a choice in the matter, what is it you want me to do for you?"

"**Kill them… kill each and every one of the villagers that have caused you so much pain and suffering, and forced me into this small shell of a prison"**

"I can't do that!! No matter how bad these people have treated me, they are still mine to protect!" I protest weakly

"**Come now kit, you and I both know that this is something you want nearly as much as I do… this can't be that bad of a deal for you can it?" **

As she is speaking, her voice begins to fade out, until it is back to being that little voice in the back of my head. I am immediately hit with a full, amplified blast of smells and sounds of the sleeping village. The new body has not only changed in appearance, but also in its strength, agility, endurance, and senses of smell, sight, and hearing.

"**Kit… just think about it…" **Kyubi whispers to me

I glance once more at my reflection and give it a feral grin before crushing the glass to powder in my hand.


End file.
